Cheers

I look in the mirror, at the girl looking back and start my day. Put on the exact same outfit as yesterday Because without the bright navy blue of my jacket. I'll seem unrecognizable to you, Brush my teeth and out the door. Remember: I have to keep a straight face, If I smile too wide or frown too much, You'll think something is wrong. If you ask me how I'm doing I'm always either fine or tired. Never good, never bad, never amazing Because you'll think something is wrong. Everyday I disguise myself as someone else, Someone that will never show my true identity, And will always be there to cheer you up. How do I feel about my disguise? I don't mind it. I've been wearing it for 7 years, So I'm practically an expert. I'll go on with my day, unbothered, But when the night falls And I lay in my bed with my insomnia and anxiety, All I can think is, what if I just gave in and didn't look back? Would you still love me if you actually saw me? Would you still love me if you knew that I love romance movies And am a sucker for a happy ending? Would you still love me if you knew that I'm secretly the biggest nerd you'll ever meet? If you knew that I can actually name 50 different constellations While also naming each planet in our solar system in order and the meaning of their names? Or how about if you knew that as stupid and reckless as I am, I'm always prepared for the worst case scenario? Would you still love me if you sobered up? If you put the bottle of lies up on the shelf And your view of me and the world wasn’t as blurry? If instead of another shot of lies, you’d listen to my truth? To my views on things? And I would no longer would seen as an angel but as an actually human being, Who is also wrong and makes mistakes and has problems. Despite everything we've been through, I know you wouldn't love me if you found out And the idea of losing you would break me apart. So please, raise your glass of lies, and pour one out for me. All raise a glass to the girl of your dreams, Your best friend, Your number one supporter, The one who doesn't really exist, To the girl I’ll never truly be.